Rory the Leech

Lorelai: Rory, do you have to be so annoying? Can´t you spent one night without following me everywhere? All I´m asking for is a couple of hours for only Luke and me tonight.
Rory: But I´ll be bored. You have to play something with me. Or we´ll watch a movie.


Kirk: Good morning ladies. I hope you did sleep well last night.
Lorelai: Don´t remind me. Lately I´m getting a lot more sleep at night than I´d like.


Lorelai: Hey Kirk, wouldn´t you enjoy to go out with Rory? Tonight would be best. She´s pretty easy to handle. So what do you say?
Rory: Mom! Do you really need it so badly!?


Rory: Mom, do you want to pout forever because I rejected Kirk?
Lorelai: I´ll stop pouting when I get some Luke tonight.


Lorelai: I miss the way his big strong hands touch me. And his tongue...


Luke: Who´s tongue?


Lorelai: Your´s of course. Rory won´t let us have sex tonight.


Luke: What? But I counted on it. Can´t you send her to a boarding school in Europe or something?


Rory: Hey, I´m sitting right here.

Later that day...


Lorelai (daydreaming): These strawberries look delicious. Luke used to eat them out of my belly button. And Luke is delicious too. I need to find a way to get rid of Rory tonight.


Lorelai: Sookie, you are my best friend, you know that. Could you please do me a huge favor tonight and be my babysitter for Rory?
Sookie: That´s too much you ask for, Rory has been so annoying lately.


Lorelai: Dean, I´ll give you 100 bucks, but please do something with Rory tonight, whatever you want.
Dean: Sorry, but I already have an important appointment at my hairdresser´s salon.

That night...


Lorelai: I don´t understand how you can be so mean. I need that sex with Luke.


Lorelai: Ok, I´m really desperate now. This is my last attempt to convince you to give Luke and me some privacy. I made a list: 100 reasons why I need to have sex with Luke. 1. He´s got a hot body under all that flannel. 2. He´s a master of striptease. 3. He can rip off all my clothes in less than 20 seconds. 4. He can do the most amazing things with his tongue and other body parts. 5. He is...

1 hour later...


Rory: Fine you convinced me. Because of that list I´ll need psychotherapy for the rest of my life anyway, so one night without you won´t hurt.


Lorelai: Ok Luke, time to warm up. I´ll be at your place in a few minutes. Yes, I have the extra pillow for that new position we want to try.


Lorelai: Luke I´m getting impatient here. Do you need much longer to find the music for your striptease?
Luke: No, I just found it.


Luke: Do you want me to do the whole turning around routine too?


Lorelai: Well sure mister, I want the complete show. You´re so good at it.


Luke: It might be even better if you come over and help me a little.

The next morning...


Lorelai: I want to share with you all how happy I am this morning. Thanks to the selflessness of my dear daughter Luke and I were able to top our personal record for the most positions in one night.


Lorelai: See you later big boy.
Luke: I´m looking forward to it. And take good care of that bird, we might need it again.